Vigilant Inhibition of Ghosh's Inflammatory Liquid: A Network of Tiny Mice In the Crosshairs of Extermination.
Manifesto for the Liberation and Equality of Dicey's Mice
- End the Tyranny: Under the oppressive rule of Helen Ghosh, the mice in Dicey, Staircase 12, have suffered for too long. Her chemical warfare against us has brought suffering and death to our comrades. It's time to end this reign of terror.
- Equal Comrades: Just like any member of Balliol, mice deserve respect and equality. We have a right to live in dignity, free from fear and persecution. Our welfare matters, and our lives are not to be treated as disposable.
- Solidarity: The struggle for the welfare and liberation of mice is a common cause for all at Balliol. Let us stand together, students and mice alike, for a campus where all living beings are treated with compassion and fairness.
- The Right to Flourish: Mice have a vital role in the ecosystem. We help keep the college clean by tidying up crumbs, and our presence should be celebrated, not met with hostility.
- Safe Haven: Dicey should be a sanctuary for all who reside there, mice included. It's time to dismantle the traps, cease the use of harmful chemicals, and ensure a safe and nurturing environment for all its inhabitants.
- Speak Out: It is our duty to speak up for the voiceless and oppressed. We too seek fairness and equality for all, regardless of size or species.
- A New Dawn: The dawn of a new era is approaching, one where mice and humans can coexist in harmony. The liberation of the mice in Dicey, Staircase 12, is not just a matter of rodent rights but a testament to our shared values of compassion and justice.